The wife is to always be happy regardless of the husband's behaviour: The Excellent Wife P/7

                                    Read Part One HERE

In this post I will continue to focus on bible teacher and author Martha Peace. This time we will look at statements from Chapter Seven of her book "The Excellent Wife."

Martha Peace: "That I may cultivate an attitude of joy and gratitude in what God is doing in my life no matter what my husband does or does not do."

Martha Peace: "That I may have joy in God deciding how my life and circumstances can glorify Him the most, that He can use me for His glory."

My Comment

God was grieved when the people of the earth were sinful (Genesis 6:6). He was not joyful and grateful.

Jesus wept over Jerusalem because she did not accept Him as her Messiah (Luke 19:41-44). He was not joyful and grateful.

Martha Peace's advice that a wife is to be joyful and grateful no matter what her husband does and does not do is unbiblical and possibly dangerous advice. Instead, a wife may need to take action in the form of calling the police, or a help-line in relation to getting support or finding a safe place for herself and her children when her husband is mentally, emotionally, spiritually and/or physically abusive.

A biblical example is Abigail who was not joyful and grateful when her husband refused to take care of David's men. She took action by bringing food and drink to them without her husband's knowledge and so avoided a blood bath (1 Samuel 25:2-38). I wonder what Martha Peace's advice would have been had she seen Abigail when she was on her way to David's men with the food and the drink. I should think Martha Peace would have tried to persuade her not to go to David's men since she was not being an obedient wife who was joyful and grateful in her circumstances....

 

Read Part Eight HERE

The wife cannot bring glory to God:The Excellent Wife P/6

 
                                     Read Part One HERE

In this post I will continue to focus on bible teacher and author Martha Peace. This time we will look at statements from Chapter Six of her book "The Excellent Wife."

Martha Peace: "Women are created in God's image but for some reason fail to bring glory to God. Because only men can bring glory to God, the husband will always be the head of the wife. Husbands are in charge of the home, but he may not be fully in charge since he can delegate responsibilities to others in the home."

Martha Peace: "How can a wife practically bring a husband glory?"
a. "Ask your husband, "What are your goals for this week?"
b. Ask your husband, "How can I help you to accomplish these goals?"
c. "Ask your husband, "Is there anything that I can do differently that would make it easier for you?"
d. "Think of specific ways that you can help him accomplish his goals."
e. "Consider the things that you are involved in. How do they glorify your husband? Ask his guidance."
f. "Realise that just as God is glorified when man obeys Him, so your husband is glorified when you obey your husband."

My Comment

Women are created in God's image and likeness according to Genesis 1:26-28. However, Martha Peace is of the opinion that women fail to bring glory to God. She very likely refers to

1 Corinthians 7:11
"A man ought not to cover his head, since he is the image and glory of God, but the woman is the glory of man."

The above text is part of a very complicated passage but one thing is clear: it does not say that women fail to bring glory to God even though Martha Peace believes that to be the case. In fact, according to Scripture, female believers, whether married or not, are encouraged to give glory to God as we can read in

John 15:8
This is to My Father's glory that you bear much fruit, showing yourselves to be My disciples.

1 Corinthians 10:31
So whether you eat or drink or whatever you do, do it all for the glory of God.

2 Corinthians 3:18
And we, who with unveiled faces, all reflect the Lord's glory, are being transformed into His likeness with ever increasing glory, which comes from the Lord, who is the Spirit.

The reason Martha Peace misunderstands 1 Corinthians 11:7 is because she may not realise that the words in this verse are not Paul's words but are words of Corinthian male leaders who believe that men only are the glory of God and that women are the glory of men. Their view is in opposition to the Creation Account in Genesis 1:26-28 where we read that God created both the man and the woman in His image and likeness. It seems Martha Peace's view is more in line with the view of these male Corinthian leaders than with God.
Martha Peace next connects her faulty understanding of 1 Corinthians 11:7 to

Ephesians 5:22 where we read
For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the Head of the Church, of which He is the Saviour.

As for the husband being "the head of his wife," Paul used the Greek term "kephale," which does not mean "authority" but means "source," "source of life." Moreover, he does not write here that the husband is the "head" or "kephale" of the home. He only writes that the husband is "the head of the wife " and not even "the head over the wife."
Paul then associates the husband's function as "head of his wife" with Christ's function as "Head of the Church" in relation to "His Saviourship," which is a sacrificial function. The husband's function as "head of his wife" is therefore a loving, ministering, nourishing, self-giving, sacrificial function without even a hint of authority attached to it.

As for a husband being in charge of the home, husband and wife share the responsibilities for the home as equal partners (1 Timothy 3:4; 1 Timothy 3:12; 1 Timothy 5:14).

As for a wife practically bringing glory to a husband, as already mentioned, that is not what the apostle Paul taught but was a corrupted form of teaching on the Creation Account of Genesis 1:26-28 brought by male leaders in Corinth.
Moreover, a wife can only bring glory to God since He will not share His glory with another (Isaiah 42:8).

 

Read Part Seven HERE

              

The wife must be gentle when speaking with a controlling husband: The Excellent Wife P/5

                                    

                                     Read Part One HERE

In this post I will continue to focus on bible teacher and author Martha Peace. This time we will look at a statement from Chapter Five of her book "The Excellent Wife."

Martha Peace: "Husbands are to lead their wives. Immature Christian husbands may act foolishly from time to time by making harsh or unreasonable demands or accusations against their wives for instance when pointing out their wives' failure to carry our responsibilities.This may especially be true if the husband has not yet learned how to lead his wife biblically. Instead of leading her in a loving way, he may sinfully resort to intimidation, manipulation, harsh criticism, or hostile teasing to accomplish his purposes. This abuse of his God-given authority often throws a Christian wife into total confusion. How is a wife to respond to an emotionally abusive husband? By quietly and gently responding with scripture, by not answering during the heat of the moment, and by acknowledging if she has done anything wrong."

My Comment

The problem lies with the first sentence of Martha Peace's statement:  "Husbands are to lead their wives." for that is not what God Word teaches.This statement is, no doubt, based on a faulty understanding of the term "head." In Ephesians 5:22 we read that the husband is the "head" of the wife. Similarly, in I Corinthians 11:3 we read that the man is the "head" of the woman. In both cases the Greek word "kephale" is used which means "source," "source of life," or "origin." However, it does not mean "authority" which is how Martha Peace understands it. Paul does, therefore, not teach that the husband is the authoritative leader of his wife. Instead, they are called to partner together as a team on an equal basis as designed by God in Genesis 1:26-28. That equal partnership was lost at the time of the Fall when the first man began to rule over the first woman (Genesis 3:16), which started a pattern that has continued until today, sadly including in much of the Church. However, in Christ, that equal partnership of Genesis 1:26-28 has been restored so, in Christ, husbands and wives are to lovingly submit to/serve each other under the Lordship of Christ as we know from Ephesians 5: 21 where we read "Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ."

 

Read Part Six HERE

The husband is to be like God the Father: The Excellent Wife P/4

                                           
                                     Read Part One HERE

In this post I will continue to focus on bible teacher and author Martha Peace. This time we will look at statements from Chapter Four of her book "The Excellent Wife."

Martha Peace: "The husband-wife relationship is similar to the Trinity. Within the Trinity there is equality in being, but as far as functions within the Trinity are concerned, God the Father is superior over God the Son and God the Spirit who voluntarily submit themselves to God the Father. Husbands and wives strive to have a relationship that follows God's pattern above."


Martha Peace: "A wife is to help her husband become like Jesus."

Martha Peace: "In your relationship with your husband, God wants you to communicate in love and experience a righteous intimacy through sharing thoughts, present and future desires, aspirations, goals, struggles and spiritual insights. Your words are to be edifying, your tasks sacrificial. Your motive for the glory of God. Remember that your pattern for oneness is the Trinity."

My Comment:

The teaching that within the God-head God the Father has authority over God the Son and God the Spirit throughout eternity in relation to their functions has become very popular since the '70s when it was introduced by Presbyterian minister George William Knight III. He, furthermore, developed the teaching on the roles of men and women connecting these roles to the roles within the Trinity in that the role of the wife is connected to the subordinate or inferior role of God the Son and the role of the husband is connected to the authoritative or superior role of God the Father. This teaching has become very popular in Evangelical circles.
However, the above teaching is unbiblical since God the Son in His Divinity never has, is not now and never will be subordinate or inferior to God the Father neither in function nor in being.
God the Son in His Humanity was subordinate to God the Father and only for a season.
Moreover the Bible does not teach on the different roles of men and women connecting these roles to roles within the Trinity. In Genesis 1:26-28 we learn that God made them male and female and told them to rule over creation together as a team on an equal basis as confirmed in Genesis 2:18 when God provides the man with a fitting/matching/corresponding partner.

As for a wife helping her husband to become like Jesus, that is not a task God has given to any wife. Instead, Jesus Himself will help any husband to become like Him, if he is willing to co-operate (Philippians 1:6).

 

Read Part Five HERE

The wife must not have any wrong thinking: The Excellent Wife P/3

                                     Read Part One HERE

 

In this post I will continue to focus on bible teacher and author Martha Peace. This time we will look at a statement from Chapter Three of her book "The Excellent Wife."

Martha Peace: "Women can either have a wrong thought or a right thought about their marriage as follows:

Wrong thought: "There is no hope for this marriage."

Right thought: "If he repents, there is nothing that I cannot forgive and that we cannot work through."

My Comment

Forgiveness is one thing but a couple can only work through issues if both parties are willing. Moreover, a couple should not be reconciled in case of mental, emotional, spiritual and/or physical abuse since there may not be real change and to be reconciled could be dangerous for the abused party.

Case One: Peter had godly sorrow (Matthew 26:750) and was reconciled to the Lord (John 21:15-19).

Case Two: Judas felt remorse but did not show godly sorrow (Matthew 27:3-4) and was never reconciled to  the Lord (Matthew 27:5).

 

Read Part Four HERE

The wife is to be ruled by her husband: The Excellent Wife P/2

                                     Read Part One HERE

In this post I continue to focus on bible teacher and author Martha Peace. This time we will look at a statement from Chapter Two of her book "The Excellent Wife."

Martha Peace: God is perfect and we can completely trust that He knows what is best for us even though husbands are not perfect and many may not be saved. In spite of the husband's imperfections, God has chosen to place the wife under the authority of her husband."

My Comment

According to Genesis 1:26-28 God placed the woman alongside the man to rule over creation together. It is clear from that passage that the man was given authority over the fish of the sea, the birds of the air and every living creature that moves on the ground. However, he was not given authority over the woman who, incidentally, was given the same authority as the man over the fish of the sea, the birds of the air and all the creatures that move along the ground. God, therefore, did not place her under the authority of her husband as Martha Peace seems to believe.

 

Read Part Three HERE

The wife is to put the slippers out for her husband: The Excellent Wife P/1

In this post I will begin to focus on bible teacher and author Martha Peace who has written the book "The Excellent Wife." We will look at certain statements in that book and comment on them one by one.

Martha Peace in Chapter One of "The Excellent Wife."

"God's will for every Christian wife is that her most important ministry be to her husband (Genesis 2:18)."

"Her husband should be the primary benefactor of his wife's time and energy, not the recipient of what may be left over at the end of the day."

My Comment

God's first words about the woman are not found in Genesis 2:18 but in Genesis 1:26-28   
"Then God said, "Let Us make man in Our image, in Our likeness, and let them rule over the fish of the sea and the birds of the air, over the livestock, over all the earth, and over all the creatures that move along the ground." So God created man in His own image, in the image of God He created him; male and female He created them. God blessed them and said to them, "Be fruitful and increase in number; fill the earth and subdue it. Rule over the fish of the sea and the birds of the air and over every living creature that moves on the ground."

It is clear from the above words that the woman was not given the task to minister to her husband but to rule over creation together with her husband. That task was confirmed in Genesis 2:18 when God spoke about the need for an "ezer kenegdo" which has been translated as "helper suitable." However, the term "ezer kenegdo" refers to an "equal partner" since it means "suitable/matching/fitting strengthener."

 

Read Part Two HERE

The wife may need to be respectfully silent: The Wilson Saga P/15

Read Part One HERE

This is my last post on Nancy Wilson, the wife of Pastor Doug Wilson of Christ Church, Moscow, Idaho, US.

Nancy Wilson has made the following statements
Nancy Wilson: "Respect is a demeanour that should characterise wives in all their conduct towards their husbands and in all their communications to or about their husbands... This means courtesy in the home, where the husband is treated with honour as the ones who are seated at the head of the table, who is leading the family in thanks at the meals in their roles as head of the house.

Nancy Wilson: "When you are tempted to criticize your husband (and you will be), when you want very much to "let him have it," pray for love. Hatred stirs up strife, but love covers all sins. Turn to the Lord for comfort, strength, silence!

Nancy Wilson: "If you have a husband like the ones described above, you must not make the  mistake of trying to undertake to deal with his sins; you must deal with your own. If however, he is a Christian man who is engaged in viewing pornography, you may need to go to the elders in your church so he can be disciplined. But if he is simply not spending enough time with you (from your perspective), or not meeting your needs in some other way, you must realise that God is the only One who can bring about change..."

Nancy Wilson: "If the problem with your husband is not big enough to share with the elders of the church (or the police), so that they may step in to deal with your husband, then it is not big enough to share with anyone. And even if you are unnecessarily silent in a situation, you probably need the practice.

My Comment
Wives are to speak into their husbands' lives as their "ezer kenegdo" or their "equal partners." They are to do so respectfully but they are not called to be silent! However, they are not responsible for their husbands' response to what they may feel led to say to them. As for husbands treating their wives with respect, Peter tells them to do so in I Peter 3:7.

As for the husband being seated at the head of the table as head of the house, both parents may be seated at opposite sides of the table and the children may be seated at the other sides of the table. Moreover, the family may have a round dinner table, in which case there are no specific sides.

As for who leads the devotions at meal times, they may be shared among all family members to encourage each member, including children, to mature in their relationship with their heavenly Father.

As for the man being the head of the house, Scripture mentions the man being the head of the woman in I Corinthians 11:3 and the husband being the head of the wife in Ephesians 5:23. In both cases the word "head" is the Greek word "kephale" which means "source" or "origin" but does not mean "authority."

A wife should never feel she has to remain silent about any issue that may not warrant going to the elders or the police but as his "ezer kenegdo" or "equal partner" she is to speak to him about any issue that she is concerned about since God has created her with a mouth. Moreover, she should feel free to go to a trusted friend or counsellor for prayer and other support.

As for pornography, it causes a man to be unfaithful to his wife in his mind (Matthew 5:28), which is a very serious issue that needs dealing with. Never feel you still have to be intimate with your husband under such circumstances, especially if he denies he has any problems. Intimacy is to be enjoyed by both partners when both lovingly give themselves to each other.

P.S. I trust that the posts on Nancy Wilson will have proven that her teachings are unbiblical and should not be followed.

 

 

The wife is called to happily do the dishes: The Wilson Saga P/14

                                                      Read Part One HERE

In this post I will continue to share on Nancy Wilson, wife of Pastor Doug Wilson of Christ Church, Moscos, Idaho, US.

Nancy Wilson has made the following statement:
"The modern woman has been deceived, like Eve, and led away by her own lusts for her God-given domain and the God-ordained responsibilities. Loaded down with sin  - discontent and envy - she is promised freedom and happiness if she will just forsake her domain -  the home - and neglect her responsibilities - husband and children."

Nancy Wilson has made the following statement as well:
" Notice the order of good deeds. Our children are first. Next is hospitality. Then comes relieving the afflicted. The wife does not have to go outside her domain to "do good." The home is the centre of her activities, and these activities can and should be pleasing to God."

Nancy Wilson has to say the following about washing dishes:
"Immediately I realised what God wanted me to do. He wanted me to do the dishes. But I still wondered if there was something else He wanted me to do. And I realised that, yes, there was something else. He wanted me to do them cheerfully."

My Comment

In he Old Testament women are mentioned who are involved in various activities but not necessarily in relation to the home or in relation to doing dishes. In fact, for most of these women their activities take place outside the home.

Miriam who was a prophetess and a leader beside her brothers Moses and Aaron (Exodus 15:20; Micah 6:4).
Deborah who was a prophetess and a judge (Judges 4:1-16).
Yael who struck down Israel's enemy Sisera (Judges 4:18-22).
Hulda who was a prophetess (II Kings 22:11-20).
Abigail who was able to persuade David not to attack them (I Samuel 25:14-38).

In the New Testament women are mentioned who are involved in various activities but, once again, not necessarily in relation to the home or in relation to washing dishes. In fact, for most of these women their activities took place outside the home.

Mary Magdalene who left home to travel with Jesus (Luke 8:2-3; Luke 24:10-11; John 20:1-18).
Joanna, the wife of Suza who left home to travel with Jesus (Luke 8:3; Luke 24:10-11.)
Susanna who left home to travel with Jesus (Luke 8:3).
Many other women who all left home to travel with Jesus (Luke 8:3; Luke 23:49, 55-56; Luke 24:10-11).
Mary, Martha's sister who sat at Jesus' feet to be taught by Him and who poured perfume over Him to prepare Him for His burial  (Luke 10:38-42; John 12:3-7).
Lydia who was a businesswoman (Acts 16:14-15).
Phoebe who was a deacon at her church and who travelled to Rome to give to the church there Paul's letter to the Romans (Romans 16:1-2)
Priscilla who was a teacher of Apollos and an overseer (Acts 18:24-26; Romans 16:3-5).
Junia who was an apostle (Romans 16:7).

 

Read Part Fifteen HERE