I am told I should not have gone to the police: Eileen's story P/2

Read Part One HERE
 

In this blog post I will contine to share on the abuse suffered by Eileen Gray, a previous member of Grace Community Church, Sun Valley, California, USA, led by Pastor John MarArthur.

 Eileen did not realise the severity of David's abuse until May 10 2001 when she found out her husband had put a sleeping bag over one of the children in order to kill the child.

Eilen then met with Grace Community Church Pastor Bill Shannon and another Grace Community Church leader and told them about her husband's abuse. In the first meeting Shannon did not offer to help. Instead, he accused Eileen of going to the law against a spiritual brother. Shannon added that the protective order she had taken out against her husband violated 1 Corinthians 7:10 which instructs women not to separate from their husbands. However, two days after the meeting, Shannon privately met with Eileen's husband David, and then the church arranged for Eileen to stay with a church family until the protective order went into effect. As a conditon of receiving this help from Grace Community Church, the church required her to attend marriage counseling with Carey Hardy who had no professional counseling credentials.

Read Part Three HERE

 

 

I and my children suffered years of violence: Eileen's experience P/1

In this post I will begin to share the story of  abuse suffered by Eileen Gray, previously a member of Grace Community Church, Sun Valley, California, USA, pastored by John MacArthur. 

Eileen Gray and her husband David attended Grace Community Church led by Pastor John MacArtur. David was involved in kids' ministry at the church. However, she and the children endured years of abuse at the hand of David.

Eileen had reported David's abuse to elders and pastors at Grace Community Church and had filed for legal separation and a restraining order against her husband David for his repeated abuse of her and her children. 

Eileen had gone to the elders of Grace Community Church hoping they would protect her and her children and get her husband professional help. Instead, the church subjected her to spiritual abusive counselling and used church discipline to try and coerce her to take David back into the family's home. She needed to model how to suffer for Christ to her children. When Eileen refused to take David back letters were sent to her between 2001  - 2002.

Read Part Two HERE

The church leadership claimed to handle things biblically: Jane's experience P/13

                           Read Part One HERE

 

 

In this post I will share some of Jane's friend, Marci Prehei's, insights into abuse at Pastor John MacArthur's church, Grace Community Church, Sun Valley, California, USA. This church is connected to The Master's University (previously called The Master's College) as well as The Master's Seminary. Marci wrote the story of Jane.

 

Marci: "As someone who has attended Grace Community Church for several years, I can attest that I have witnessed people being silenced, bullied and being put out of church. I have experienced quite a bit of this myself as well in all three of the churches that I have attended over the years that are affiliated with Grace Community Church and The Master's Seminary."

Marci: "For years I too was a staunch John MacArthur follower. However, even back when I attended his church, my friends and I questioned some suspicious things - mostly women being mistreated at the hands of men and then blamed for the mistreatment. They were required to be silent about it and "trust the godly men that were put over them." 

Marci: "My friends and I all agreed that we didn't have all the information, and that the church leadership probably knew what they were doing. We trusted them to handle things biblically as they claimed to do. We agreed that we shouldn't speak of those things so as not to drag Jesus' Name through the mud."

Marci: "I was silent about an incident I was very close to about 25 years or so ago. Other people did speak up to no avail. I regret that silence because a student of The Master's Seminary who was a known sexual predator graduated from The Master's Seminary. He went on to become a youth pastor where he groomed and sexually preyed upon at least 8 women, perhaps many more. I have spoken out about a few of these situations, but it has never been for legal or monetary benefit - only a desire for internal change."

P.S. This is my last post on the abuse of Jane. In my next post I will begin to share the story of Eileen Gray's abuse at Grace Community Church, pastored by John MacArthur.

 

I am taking my life back: Jane's experience P/12

                  Read Part One HERE

 I will continue to share the story of a young woman's experience at The Master's College (now The Master's University or TMU), which is connected to Pastor John MacArthur's church, Grace Community Church, Sun Valley, California, USA. I will call her Jane eventhough that is not her real name. Her story covers a number of years of her life starting when she was fifteen before she entered The Master's College.

Jane: "It is 2008. I am still getting Facebook messages and emails from people I know at The Master's College calling me to repentance. They are rebuking me and quoting Scriptures about immorality and fornication. I know the narrative now. They have been told that I was sleeping around and was kicked out for drinking and carousing. They know my character and yet still assume it is true. Only one person from that whole community believes me - my roommate from Junior year."

Jane: "It is 2017. I have told a few people over the years about what happened to me, but mostly I want to move on and live my life and forget. I can't forget. I am trying to get my graduate degree but on paper failed three years of college and flunked out. I had to relive this nightmare trying to get my undergrade Psychology degree, and now again applying for graduate school. Every time I work with rape victimes, I relive my own trauma. I realise that I cannot move on until I bring this darkness into light - even if that helps just one person - even if that person is me. I am 32 years old and I am taking my life back. My name is Jane. Do you see me?"

 

P.S. This story exposes the mysogyny which is so prevalent among the leaders at The Master's College (now The Master's University) and Grace Community Church led by Pastor John MacArthur. As far as we know, the rapist was never removed from Seminary, very likely, because he "repented" with (crocodile?) tears and will have gone on to become a minister at a Reformed Church. It is, of course, possible that he repeated his actions of drugging/raping another innocent girl either while at Seminary or beyond and may have been caught then. We will never know, of course.

Read Part Thirteen HERE

I am told that I am rebellious: Jane's experience P/11

    Read Part One HERE

I will continue to share the story of a young woman's experience at The Master's College (now The Master's University or TMU), which is connected to Pastor John MacArthur's church, Grace Community Church, Sun Valley, California, USA. I will call her Jane eventhough that is not her real name. Her story covers a number of years of her life starting when she was fifteen before she entered The Master's College.

 Jane: "Rick says something about apologising for the dress I was wearing at the bar and for drinking alcohol. He says I caused this young man to stumble, and he is incensed that I have not dropped the charges with the police. He says he has been talking to Joe (the Assistant Dean of The Master's College), Sandra (the Biblical Counsellor) and my RD (Resident Director) and they all say that my story keeps changing. I wonder why they are all allowed to talk about it but I am not. If I am to be reinstated in the school I must agree to weekly counselling with Rick and the stranger. I am told that the stranger and I have committed this sin together and therefore we must work through it together. I must agree to sit next to the stranger in church every week."

Jane: "I don't know where to begin. Do I start with the fact that I didn't put that dress on or how my story isn't changing, I am just remembering more things. I feel confused and angry. I am yelling. I hear more accusations coming out of Rick's mouth. I am told that I am not submissive, that I don't trust the men that God has put over me, that I am rebellious. He is angry and I cannot keep up with all of the attacks that are flying out of his mouth. I am kicked out of school. I have less than twenty-four hours to get my things out of my room and get out. If I show up on campus I will be arrested. They are changing my three years of earned College credits from A's to F's. I have flunked out of College."

Read Part Twelve HERE

I have to apologize to my rapist: Jan's experience P/10

        Read Part One HERE

I will continue to share the story of a young woman's experience at The Master's College (now The Master's University or TMU), which is connected to Pastor JohnMacArthur's church, Grace Community Church, Sun Valley, California, USA. I will call her Jane eventhough that is not her real name. Her story covers a number of years of her life starting when she was fifteen before she entered The Master's College.

Jane: "I am standing outside the door to Rick's Office. I take a deep breath and feel confident to do whatever it is that he asks me to do. I open the door and am shocked to see the stranger sitting there. I am starting to shake and sweat. Rick asks me to sit down by my rapist. Rick speaks for the rapist."

Jane: "Rick tells me, "He has admitted to everything he has done. He has acknowledged his sin and that this relationship was not consensual and he has repented. Look at him, he is crying."

Jane: "I don't want to look at him but I do. I feel panicked sitting close to him. I am wondering why I have to be present if it has become clear that I am innocent. Why wasn't I immediately reinstated in school?"

Jane: "Now, it is your turn to apologise, Jane."  I do not think I am hearing right. I think that Rick Holland has just asked me to apologise to my rapist. Apologise for what? I ask."

Read Part Eleven HERE

I plan to do whatever they tell me to do: Jane's experience P/9

                                                      Read Part One HERE

I will continue to share the story of a young woman's experience at The Master's College (now The Master's University or TMU), which is connected to Pastor John MacArthur's church, Community Grace Church, Sun Valley, California, USA. I will cal her Jane eventhough that is not her real name. Her story covers a number of years of her life starting when she was fifteen before she entered The Master's College.

Jane: "My parents are coming to get me. I need to get out of here anyway. They are angry not only for what has happened to me, but how it is being handled, I want to have victory over this and get my degree from Master's still. My dad has a man-to-man talk with Joe Keller, the Assistant Dean of the Master's College. Nothing comes of it. I am still being sent home to think through the list they have given me of things I need to repent of. I am comforted by my parents' anger, but I hold them back from their need to bring about justice. To me it feels like a David and a Goliath situation, only this time Goliath wins. I just want to forget all this and go back to a week ago when I was happy and safe and optimistic."

Jane: "I am home with my parents now. I receive a call from Rick Holland. There are a few stipulations that I must agree to if I want to finish my senior year at The Master's College. I plan to do whatever they tell me to do so I can get my degree and get out of there. He asks me to come in and meet with him.

Read Part Ten HERE

I willl be kicked out of College: Jane's experience P/8

Read Part One HERE

I will continue the story of a young woman's experience at The Master's College (now the Master's University or TMU), which is connected to Pastor John MacArthur's church, Grace Community Church, Sun Valley, California. I will call her Jane even though that is not her real name. Her story covers a number of her years starting when she was fifteen before she entered The Master's College.

Jane; "I am meeting with Rick Holland (again) -  the College Pastor for the church that is affiliated with the College (Grace Community Church). We are alone in his office. I think it is strange that there is not a third person present. I learned in my classes that a male and a female should never be left alone in a counselling situation... He insists I tell him everything.... I tell him every excruciating detail I can remember."....

Jane; "Rick leaves the room several times to go talk to Pastor John MacArthur. He comes back with Pastor John's ruling on the matter. Rick tells me that I need to be disciplined for doing drugs, drinking alcohol and almost dancing. He said the consequence for breaking the rules is that I will be kicked out of the College. He is angry at me for going to the police and the doctor. I should have let the church handle this without interference. He tells me not to tell anyone, not my fellow classmates, not my teachers, not anyone at church. "You are ruining that young man's life," he says."....

Read Part Nine HERE

I am told to drop the charges: Jane's experience P/7

 

 

 Read Part One HERE

I will continue to share the story of a young woman's experience at The Master's College (now The Master's University or TMU), which is connected to Pastor John MacArthur's church, Grace Community Church, Sun Valley, California, USA. I will call her Jane eventhough that is not her real name. Her story covers a number of years of her life starting when she was fifteen before she started The Master's College.

 Jane: "Rick Holland tells me I have to go to the police and drop the charges or I will be brought in front of the church to be disciplined. I don't drop the charges. Not that it matters. The police interview the rapist and all the "friends" who were there and ruled it a "he-said, she-said" incident that can't be proven either way."

Jane: "I don't keep quiet either. I reach out to the professors who "disagree with John MacArthur on a few things." They won't see me. People are avoiding me. I feel their whispers. Even close friends are acting weird."

Jane: "I am trying to defend myself to Rick Holland, but he is angry and dismissive. He is openly offended that I would speak to him so frankly, and I am being accused of being hard headed. I understand there's a narrative being created about me but I don't know what it is. I only know I'm completely alone.

Read Part Eight Here